Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Must Be Tuesday
You ever have a day spent McGuyvering a buzz out of tequila, Nyquil (tm) and Jell-O (tm)?
Must be Tuesday.
• Why do beauty products that promise me “younger looking skin” fulfill this promise by making me break out like a teenager?
• Why didn’t I realize that snorting brownies would hurt?
• Why does Scotch taste so damn good?
• Why am I out of Scotch?
• Why can’t I find my pants…again?
• Why did Berkley Breathed think that “Outland” would be an even remotely reasonable successor to “Bloom County”?
• Why did I think my allergies would go away faster if I shot the Sudafed directly into my eye?
• Why are we only supposed to eat chocolate in moderation when stuffing ourselves until we’re heady with endorphins from the rich, dark chocolate-y goodness – excuse me, I have to find some chocolate…
• Why am I out of chocolate?
• Why did George Bush finally have to go and make a statement I agree with:
Re: Live 8 – “…Bush came out strongly against MTV cutting into Pink Floyd’s set”. Statement was made after Bush met with Bob Geldof and Bono during the G8 summit. (Rolling Stone. July 28, 2005. page 36 - I'd post an online link, but I couldn't find one. However, here's a picture of them:)
It's enough to make me drink engine coolant.