Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Slacking and Sucking...Not Necessarily In That Order


...An Open Letter To The Fucktard That Cut Me Off This Morning

Dear Gentleman In The White Ford "Super Duty" Uber Pick-up With The "Support The Troops" and "Bush-Cheney 2004" Stickers, American Flag Attached To Your Antenna And The Low Slung Suspension Who Cut Me Off At The Mobile Station This Morning:



I'm really . sorry about your penis.



Really.

But, you still suck.

Kisses,
Scoop


...Slack Much?

Are You A Slacker?

"A new survey finds that the average worker wastes more than two hours a day, and that’s not including lunch.

That means companies spend as much as 759 (b) billion dollars on salaries annually for which they receive no apparent benefit.

The results are from a Web survey by America Online and Salary-dot-com.

The top excuse for wasting time nationwide is not enough work."


Wow. I guess it's nice to see I'm not alone in my slacking. Although I don't think I blow off my work because I don't have enough of it. Rather, I simply don't want to do it. Repeatedly slapping enough red ink on a kid's essay that it looks as though I've bled on it can suck the life out of anyone after a while. Plus, why should I use my prep time to plan lessons when I have a brand spanking new internet connection in my room to play with? Oh, yeah. The children are our future, etc, etc. But, I live in the now and in the now I frequently am fighting a hangover that likes to be fed constant dosages of aspirin, coffee and Minesweeper.

Oh, and congrats Missouri! Apparently, your state is number 1 when it comes to time wasted at work! Good job!

4 comments:

roundelay said...

Fucktard!! O thank you! I've been feeling as though I've become overly dependent on "asshat" recently. I may have to work "fucktard" into rotaion and spice things up a bit.

Blog ho said...

i hate the guy that cut you off. and i certainly am a slacker. hardcore slacker, though. that's the best kind.

Dave Morris said...

Pickup man will definitely get his.

And being in Missouri, I can tell you... yes. It's true. We are the top of the fucking heap. Or would it be the bottom of the heap?

One more thing, I also LOVE the term fuck-tard. LOVE it.

JamesTr said...

It's great to be a slacker. Especially when your performance reviews come back and say you're "the most productive person".