Friday, April 14, 2006

I Gave Up My Liver For Lent and other tales...

Oh sweet, sweet Cherry Wheat. What is it about you that tempts me to start drinking at 3:30 in the afternoon? I mean, I'm on vacation and all, but still...

Let me say, for the record, I'm not much of a "candy booze" drinker. When I'm drinking my booze, I want it to be booze flavored. I don't think that's asking a lot from my beverage. This is why I tend to stick with scotch or various wines. I know what I'm getting with every sip, which is to say, drunk. Candy booze (think anything with a name like "Strawberry Calypso Punch", ends in the suffix "-tini" that is not an actual martini, or involves Red Bull as a mixer) is insidious and should be left to lightweights, club kiddies and Lindsay Lohan.

"I don't know why I'm puking up fluorescent pink goo! I only had 6 drinks! Say, is that my own blood?"

But, I keep coming back to Sam Adams Cherry Wheat beer time and time again. And I lived through the early 90's when every microbrew in the world was releasing a fruit flavored beer just as I was old enough to legally. drink. I don't find the cherry flavor cloying. The wheat beer itself is crisp. On a hot day, this beer is a mouthful of summer.

It helps that it's about 70 degrees outside. A veritable damn heatwave. Bottoms up, Mr. Adams!


My favorite time of the school year is the day before vacation. We have a party in each of my classes. I get the kids all full of chocolate and sugar and send them home to their parents. I call it "giving back".


This is the beer my dad used to drink when I was growing up, Narragansett. He'd buy it by the caseload. Not because it was good. It was cheap and that was enough. He told me that it was the first beer that he ever bought (possibly underage) from the tap in the bar of the Massasoit Hotel in my hometown, where he'd hang out in the summer after he got off work. At a quarter a pint, it was probably overpriced even then. He used to tell me that, when I was very little, he would pour the beer into a big glass (I remember the glasses in our house were big and kind of owl shaped) and leave the glass on the floor by his recliner. I would, apparently, come toddling by and steal the heads of foam of the glass when I thought he wasn't looking. He said it was "cute", but I think he just wanted me to not argue when it was naptime.

One of the barbecue places near me started carrying cans of the stuff recently. Mr. Scoop and I bought one. Yes, one. To sample. Tasting it, I was assaulted by flavors involving yeast, tap water and library paste. I let Mr. Scoop finish it. For science. I'm not sure how I stomached that beer as a toddler, although kids will put anything in their mouth.

Linked to: Comedian Jenée: People are Idiots

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1 comment:

The Fight Guy said...

Dear Gawd. Naughty, naughty Natty Light. Right up there with a kennel of Black Labs and the track of The Beast in our collegiate Hall o' Shame.

Yes, I remember those days. Vaguely. But that's not from the cheap beer.

The cheap whiskey, on t'other hand...