Tuesday, July 07, 2009

I Can Has Cheezburger!

No. It's not a LOLcat. It's better. It's an actual cheeseburger.

This burger is about the cheese. I wanted to take advantage of a particularly yummy Gorgonzola Dolce in my fridge before it turned into a science experiment. Well, more of one anyway.

The nice thing about using turkey is that it frees you up from the constraints of burger purism. Beef based burgers have a lot of baggage. Use only beef. Don't put any binders or flavorings in it other than salt, otherwise you're making meatloaf, douchebag. It must be a grind of at least 80% beef and 20% fat. You are grinding your own beef, right? If you don't grind your own meat, you're an asshole. You may as well eat at McDonald's. God, you suck. Use a griddle. Poseurs grill. And make sure you cook it medium rare. Oh, wait no, you can't do that. Buy a thermometer and make sure it's at least 160 degrees FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T YOU KNOW YOU'LL DIE OF THE BACTERIAL ICK?!?!?!? Why are you even bothering? Clearly, you don't know what you're doing. Is that a brioche bun? Where are the Martin's Potato Rolls, for fuck's sake! You don't love the burger like I do! NO BURGER FOR YOU!!!

Sometimes, I think I should spend less time reading the Intertrons and more time outside. Then, I open another beer.

Using turkey breast accomplishes two things. One, it takes the "how done should this be?" out of the equation. It's poultry. Cook it until it's done. Two, it's an extremely mild flavored, lean meat. Moisture is added by mixing in shallots and shredded cheese. The focus of the flavor of this burger should be on the cheese. You can use whatever cheeses make you happy with this particular recipe. I've done variations swapping smoked Monterey Jack for some or all of the Mozzarella. Mr. Scoop enjoyed his burger with a slice of Pepper Jack instead of the Gorgonzola. It's your damn burger; enjoy it anyway you like.

Blue Cheese Turkey Burger

1.3 lbs ground turkey breast
1 c. shredded Mozzarella
1 shallot, finely minced
2 t. soy sauce
1 t. Worcestershire sauce
1/8 t. ground white pepper
cooking spray
4 oz. Gorgonzola Dolce (or other blue cheese)
4 hamburger buns, split

1. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees Fahrenheit.

2. Mix the first 6 ingredients until well combined. Shape the meat mixture into 4 patties.

3. Spray a large, heavy skillet with cooking spray. Heat to medium high. Place the patties into the skillet and cook on one side for 6 minutes. Flip the patties and place into the oven to cook for 6 minutes.

4. Remove the skillet from the oven. Divide the Gorgonzola evenly over the patties. Place the skillet back into the oven to cook for about 1 more minute. The Gorgonzola should be soft spreadable at this stage, but not melted so much that it is running off the burger.

5. When the cheese has softened, remove the patties from the skillet and place them in the hamburger buns. Serve immediately with whatever condiments you like.

Serves 4.

Oh, and here's a LOLcat:

Dis mah brudder fum anudder mudder

1 comment:

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